A Desire for tears – January 15th, 2019.
It is said, the Devil is like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Does he not hunt? Does he not prowl nor prey upon? He roars because he is full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. He devours those who have given themselves over to him, caught in the subtle snares of temptation. For he has no power over us except that which we give him. Yet, we can avoid such traps, but often our curiosity gets the best of us. What is behind that door? What if? What will happen? What does this feel like, taste like, or look like? We already know the answers to these questions, but we open the door, or pursue the answer in hoping that it will be different this time. We continue to do the same thing over and over again, hoping for a different result; a different answer. This is a basis for insanity. The world is insanity.
I pray for the fortitude to avoid these temptations, but from time to time my imagination gets the best of me, haunting me from the edges of my own volition. I try to look back upon my sins with contrition, and sometimes I may get a tear or two to shed from my wearied eyes in the midst of prayer. Though, I am not an emotional person, and lament my own lack of tears. I do find music to be a key to the heart, and so there is a song I play when I feel the need to cry, because for the lyrics alone, I cannot but help cry. It is not even a Christian song, but the words reverberate in my very soul.
?Shine, shine your light on me
Illuminate me, make me complete
Lay me down, and wash this world from me
Open the skies, and burn it all away
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, all my life just waiting
For you to shine, shine your light on me?
O Lord, that I would be purified from the stains of this world; that your all consuming love would burn away the superfluities of the flesh, and my soul would be free of the passions that plague me May your light illumine me, that I may shine your light into every dark corner of this world you lead me into.
